detours (mother, can you hold me together?)

The bathroom light isn’t working anymore. And changing the bulb didn’t work. I should make a list of all the things in this apartment that doesn’t work. And I don’t know, maybe fix it. Or get someone to fix it. No, scratch that, I should just make a list of all the things in this apartment that does work. It’ll be easier to come up with that short a list.



I’m so pissed off. And not just because of the light.



I lost another chub. She just flew away. I was changing their water when she flew out of the cage. I tried to catch her but all I got was a big bump on my head and a few broken clay pots. I feel really bad about the chub. I lost her love, and I really can’t have another one. They just keep dying on me. And I don’t want to get a new one just to see it die. I don’t know what to do… if I keep her separated from the other chubs, she is going to kill herself from loneliness... she cries all the time. but if I let her join the other two chubs, who are still nursing their new baby chub, then it’ll be a bloody murder…



I miss tascha. I haven’t seen her in a week. I was too busy/sick to see her. I miss her warmth whenever she’s on my lap. i think of her and my heart literally aches.



I read somewhere that happiness is a warm puppy…



NP: detours : sheryl crow "Mother, can you hold me together? It's so dark and I'm losing my way Mother, I know you are with me I can't stop looking back for the answers I just keep coming up with regret There are some things I just can't forget.."