lifeless dead

the cracks and lines from where you gave up
they make an easy man to read, oh
for all the times you let them bleed you
for little peace from God you plead, and beg
for little peace from God you plead

wake up young man, wake up, wake up

~ wake up
mad season



i had the longest episode of my long recurring sleeping paralyses this morning. this time, i didn’t even try to fight it. just went along. i thought, if i can’t move, then i won’t move. if i can’t breathe, then i won’t breathe. if this is how i’m going to die, then this is how it’s going to be.

this has been happening almost every day for a long time now. sometimes they happen several times in one night. and lately, i’ve been losing the will to fight it… so close to embracing that ugly fate…

the tragedy is that i still wake up every morning.

i’m still here. alive. and breathing. to mock you.